Willy Wonka/Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
I thought I would pick the most obvious one first. The story of of a candy maker letting children in his factory is fine, the perpetual homicide of each child is not though. Most kids may not realize the reason for less and less characters as the movie progresses and only focus on the candy but there has to a few that see it. Lets not even mention the boat ride scene in the original...I'll just remind you:
Tim Burton's remake is no better either, I think the introduction of Willy Wonka when the singing dolls burst into fire and burn midst song says enough.
The Nightmare Before Christmas
One of my favorite movies of all time but you can be certain when I have a kid this DVD is staying on the shelf for a while. Nothing like a talking skeleton, two faced mayor, mad scientist (with a removable top of the head) and a monster made completely out of bugs to get into the Christmas spirit. There's not much else to say about this one, it's very self explanatory. I will say that Tim Burton is children as racism is to minorities.
Labyrinth
Labyrinth is not as obvious as the previous one's but let me explain. Now I at least saw this when I was a kid, perhaps my parents just didn't like me but I know I wasn't the only one. It's just a dark movie, and David Bowie in a skin tight suit with a cod piece is inappropriate for children and can cause much mental scarring. Not to mention that I still sing "you remind me of the babe? what babe? the babe with the power? what power? the power of voodoo?" EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE!!
Hocus Pocus
Hocus Pocus isn't that bad but more the underlying story behind it that is just wrong. It's the story of three witches trying to capture and kill a virgin boy. I think that a children's movie that makes it seem wrong to be a virgin is a little weird, this movie came out when I was five...I didn't really have a choice. Along the same lines, Sarah Jessica Parker added alot of sexuality to her character, which is fine when I watch it now but I believe that might have been for the dad's taking their kids to the theater.
The Witches
It's been a LONG time since I've seen this movie and my memory of it is very fuzzy. All I remember is a boy mutating into a mouse (much like the scene from American Warewolf in London) and the creepiest looking witch I have ever seen...that's almost twenty years past and I still remember.
Toys
I know...I know...Toys was never meant to be a kids movie. I put it on here because although it was never advertised as a kids movie it's very misleading. I saw this when I was still at a age to be considered a "kid" and I think when Joan Cusack's character is standing at her fathers grave, complete with a memorial that has a continuous laugh track, I realized that this is probably for an older audience. A great movie though.
Adams Family
Was it the cemetery in the backyard or the brother and sister that try to kill each other in the most horrific ways possible that caused filmmakers to give it a family genre stamp. Lets not forget the hour and a half foreplay between Gomez and Morticia. Just because "family" is in the title does not make it a "family" movie.
James and the Giant Peach
The second half is fine and dandy but lets look at the first hour. It follows young James as his parents are killed by a rhinoceros from the heavens and he is forced to live with his aunts that practically whore for money and make him their slave. "Honey! I'll be right back, I'm gunna put the fear of us dying into the kids minds early in life!"
Monster House
Its about a house possessed by a dead obese women that EATS people! And it was in 3D!!
What movie ruined your childhood?
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